Well after some creeping and tinkering, I've learned a few more things about this blogging business. Twilight is on in the background and I just made a delicious tea with one of those genius one-cup coffee machines! Brilliant!
I must now also tip my hat to another amazing appliance I acquired today... oh ya baby... a brand new, super delicious DEEP FRYER! Who needs a boyfriend.... well alright I still do but for now... I am a genius with a belly filled with scrumptious treats.
I woke up this morning with a craving for tempura snap peas and asparagus from the Keg and the more I thought about it... i thought "hmmmm I'll make it myself". So I went to Wal-mart... scoped out the new member of the fam and then became a little disheartened when I saw the massive line ups! No seriously... this was like Christmas Eve crunch time line ups when all the dudes are buying perfume... Anyways I just got in any line and stood there with my huge box... that's what she said... and waited. Then after 3 minutes or so I saw the 12 items or less line so I moved... it was very long but I figured it would be quicker... and oh baby it surely was because as soon as I got into line... a man from the "jewelery" department said "oh miss if you only have that one item I can ring you through" and I said "SOLD!!"
It was awesome and I told the guy how he really made me a happy customer and that I really appreciated it. You've gotta show appreciation even for little things like that... so in turn I spread some cheer at the grocery store letting someone go in front of me. Had to go there next to buy my snap peas, asparagus, oil and potatoes... fresh cut fries yum yum! But sadly... no snap peas... so I went to another grocery store and yuppers... score!
Anyways the food was well... WELL worth the effort here at Lonely Hearts Hotel... ya that's my house right now with me and the cats... It's been quite a while since I've had a boyfriend BUT I am trying. I'm on Eharmony... shakes own head... FML it's brutal. I really just wish I could meet "him". I'm a pretty normal chick. I have some vices but we all do... I just need to figure out what I'm doing wrong. I need to be more choosy.
Have you ever seen the movie "the Ugly Truth"? The is some truth to that shit. Trust me. I've tried a few of the techniques and I'm going to put them back in the play book. I absolutely hate playing games... but the weird thing is these games actually work... like the scene where Gerard Butler gives her advice about hanging up on the guy mid-phone call and picking back up saying another dudes name....? PURE GOLD! Legit ladies that shit works! This might seem nuts but its an awesome and powerful experiment... ready?
You like this guy... you creep his Facebook 7 times a day minimum... you know exactly the number of friends he has so you can make sure he doesn't add some skank... I mean other girl... when clearly he should be thinking about you... anyways... you check your phone every 5 to 6 minutes just to make sure you didn't miss a text or a call... you maybe wake up in the middle of the night and check too... okay you're with me... you like him but he keeps you hanging on the line and guessing all the time... maybe a rando message here or there and a couple dates.... So delete him. From Facebook or BBM... Guaranteed - GUARAN-F'ING-TEED he will message or call or something and ask about it. If its from Facebook and unless you're a total psycho creeping his page and he doesn't even know you exist... if you've been on dates that means he's creeping your page too and the big delete will come as a shock... he will msg and you can either play more games and say "it's so weird so many of my contacts got deleted...." or you can be honest and say "oh well you didn't seem to into me so I didn't think you'd miss me..."
Give it a shot... or not... but mark my words "the delete is powerful!" - L
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